The Accidental Intercom Philosopher

 

✈️ “The Accidental Intercom Philosopher”



Flight: Seattle to Chicago
Cabin: Cruise altitude, 35,000 feet
Incident: First Officer accidentally hits PA instead of intercom… while having an existential crisis.

FO thinks he’s just talking to the captain:


FO: “You ever think about how we’re just metal tubes with souls in the sky, faking control while physics pretends to like us?”

Captain: “What the hell are you—wait—did you hit the—"

PA crackles to life in full stereo across the cabin:
"—and like, if we turn off autopilot, do we actually know how to fly? Or is it all just... muscle memory and lies?”

Ten seconds of dead silence.

Then someone in first class claps slowly.

Flight attendants start getting drink requests from people who suddenly need "emotional support scotch."

A kid in 14A tells his mom: “I don’t want to be a pilot anymore. I want to be stable.”

They land safely, and the FO is promoted to “in-flight philosopher in residence.”

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